Some of you who've been following my journals over the last few years (as few as they've been) may remember a journal I once posted back in 2008, regarding what became of my mother's health due to kidney disease:Back at last
Unfortunately, things have recently taken a turn for the worse. A few days ago, my mother went out of town to have a graft in her left arm (which she used for getting kidney dialysis) redone in hospital, for which she had to stay overnight. While in hospital, she had apparently caught what seemed to be a mild cold, but otherwise seemed fine.
But early this morning, Mom woke up coughing and vomiting unexpectedly and had suffered an apparent seizure and cardiac arrest. She was brought to the hospital in my hometown by paramedics after they administered CPR, but she had suffered an infection as a result of accidentally inhaling some of the vomit and, according to the specialist I spoke to with my family, she had suffered some swelling of the brain from the infection, which the doctor said my mother had little chance of surviving.
To say the least, this was really upsetting to me on account of not only the illness itself, but how quickly it happened. I was glad to have my sister, her boyfriend and a cousin along to accompany me for support, but it didn't keep me from just breaking down and losing it when I went into the hospital's trauma room where Mom was (she was on a ventilator at that point) and sat down to hold her hand and be with her while the nurses did what they could to keep her as comfortable as they could make her.
At one point, I asked to have a priest come in to bless Mom and say prayers for her while my sister, my cousin and I were there with her. A while later, my brother eventually arrived, which gave the whole family a chance to say their goodbyes to Mom. As she gradually slipped away, I held Mom's hand the entire time and made sure she knew I was there, along with the rest of the family. I was still holding her hand as she peacefully passed away a few minutes after 1:00 this afternoon, then I kissed her on her forehead, told her I loved her and said I would see her.
This has been hard for me to write because the memories of what happened at the hospital today are still fresh for me. What I do know is that, as one of my cousins told me, Mom is thankfully not suffering anymore and is now at peace. Looking back, she had always been good to me and supportive of me, and I 'm glad to have had her for as long as I did and she will live on in my memories.
On that note, I probably won't be around for at least a few days while I and my family continue to deal with this personal loss.